On our first whole school gathering of the term, we not only welcomed on board new staff and pupils to the school, but also considered together the potential impact of our self-talk. 

As a school with pupil’s happiness and wellbeing at the heart of all we do, we aim to support children, teachers, and parents, to build the foundations necessary for children to flourish and be happy.

As a community, we have been discussing the inner voice we all have. Our inner voice can be incredibly useful, helping us to plan out tasks in our heads and to think through alternative solutions, but we also use it to talk about ourselves. Unfortunately, our inner voice, especially as children, can be critical and negative.

Positive self-talk can impact on our resilience, concentration, confidence, self-image and performance. Amongst the strategies we discussed to help our pupils ensure their self-talk is kind and affirmative, we considered:

Energising self-talk
This style of self-talk can act as a call to action and removes apathy. A useful prompt is “Don’t rush to I can’t”.  Essentially, in order to enhance their resilience, it can be beneficial if pupils avoid using absolutes when they talk to themselves. Just talking to and about yourself in an upbeat manner can also increase motivation and stamina.

Asking yourself questions
By asking, “How am I going to do this?”, or, “What are the different ways I can tackle this?”, our brains start to develop potential answers.  This can help us focus on solutions and looking forward, rather than dwelling on the problem itself, which can be an unhelpful approach.

Using “You”
Talking to yourself in the second person (You can do this) is often more effective than talking in the first person (I can do this). I wonder whether this is due to the “You” sounding like the voice of another perhaps?

Giving yourself instructions
Telling yourself what to do, or planning your next steps, can assist us in learning new tasks more quickly and even performing better when we are under pressure. Some research also suggests this approach helps our self-control and focus, as it helps us plan, prepare and focus on the things we can control.

This sort of work can appear to be part of what some writers have termed the ‘Cult of Positivity’, but I firmly believe that the words we use about ourselves can limit us and be a block on us achieving whatever aims we have. 

As teachers and parents, we want to nurture our child’s inner voice, we do not want to be allowing our children’s own inner voice to limit their ambitions and aspirations before they have take a single step towards them.

Want to know more about supporting your child to develop a positive inner voice? We recommend ‘A Fine Parent’s’ guide to positive parenting. Click here to learn more.

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